Talk to her friends – do they know how you insulted her? Replay the event in your head – did you say something off-hand that you didn’t realize was offensive?
Get your apology in as soon as possible – the longer you wait to say sorry the harder it will be to convince her that you mean it.
Make eye contact. Slightly bow your head. Talk in a slow, calm, and measured voice. Don’t rush your apology to “get it over with. "
“I’m so sorry I said that – I never meant to hurt you and I won’t say it again. " “I made a mistake thinking that was okay, it won’t happen again. "
There is no more effective way to ask for forgiveness than a simple, “I’m sorry. "
Do not, however, feel like you “owe” her anything. Your actions should be done out of caring, and she should not take advantage of you with absurd or unreasonable demands.
You don’t need to act like she is queen. Basic dignity and curtsey should suffice.
The offender does not get to choose what is offensive. If she felt insulted, then you insulted her.
