You should always be respectful when arguing with another person. Remember, that’s what they are: another person. Treat them the way that you would want to be treated. Don’t immediately dismiss their ideas just because they don’t agree with you. Listen to them.
Watch out for arguments with incorrectly assume that correlation means causation. For example, rates of autism diagnosis increased with the usage of cell phones. Therefore, autism is caused by cellphone usage. Post-hoc fallacies are similar, but are based on the idea that because A preceded B, B was caused by A. An Argument from Silence fallacy is the idea that because there is no evidence for something, it must not exist. For example, God/germs/evolution/aliens do not exist because we have never physically witnessed them. Non-Sequiturs are when the conclusion of an argument is unrelated to its premise. For example, the argument that we can’t pay teachers more because policemen and firefighters do not make that much money. [9] X Research source
For example, “I know you really, really want to help people. You’re one of the most generous people that I know. But if you really wanted to help people, you wouldn’t donate to a charity that misuses their money like that. Don’t you want to be sure that your money is directly saving lives?”
Generally, if someone seems like they’re getting really upset, it’s time to end the argument. Close the argument with something like, “Okay, I can see that I can’t change your mind but, please, just think about what I said. "
Don’t allow subject changes. The other person might try to change the subject in order to cover up a mistake. Many people, when proven wrong in some area, will rather be dismissive of their mistake rather than acknowledging their error. Either leave the argument if the person refuses to acknowledge mistakes (“It doesn’t matter”, “Whatever, that’s my opinion. “, etc. ), or insist they acknowledge their error.
If you’re not sure how to counter their argument, use your active listening skills. Invite the other person to talk, and be really interested in them and what they have to say. Then, paraphrase what you’re hearing to show the person you’re following along. [16] X Expert Source Jessica Notini, JDNegotiation & Mediation Coach Expert Interview. 27 March 2020.
If you’ve been talking for a long time and neither one of you is budging, consider calling it a day. There are some arguments you can’t win, no matter how good your argument is, if the other person isn’t willing to rethink the problem. If you know when to quit, you might still be able to preserve the relationship.
