Feminism is a movement by women for women. This means that feminists are women who are working to better the lives of other women. There can be different types of feminism that represent different female groups in society, from African American women to trans women, but the basis of the movement is for and by women. Men can act as allies to women and work with women to demonstrate their support of the movement but they are not a dominant force in the movement. Feminism is a movement about gender justice. This means that feminism works against the system of oppression we live in, which affects women as well as other non-binary individuals (or individuals who are not straight men). In this approach to feminism, people of all genders can be feminists as long as they are willing to work to dismantle the system of oppression that we currently live in.
Recognizing that we exist in a patriarchal society will allow you to better understand the need for feminism and for movements to work against the existing patriarchy. Just because feminism works against the effects of patriarchy does not mean feminists hate all men. Instead, men can be seen as allies to women in the fight against patriarchy. The support of men in the feminist movement will ultimately benefit people of all genders.
There are several well known feminist blogs and websites online that are updated regularly. Many of these blogs are written by women for women, but are of course, accessible for men, too. [6] X Research source
Look for feminist magazines, such as Bitch Magazine or BUST Magazine, at your local bookstore, magazine stand, or at your local library. You can also subscribe to these magazines online. [7] X Research source
This concept is also known as “checking your privilege”, where you recognize and acknowledge your male privilege before you respond to a woman who is speaking to you or to women that are in a shared space with you. This will allow you to keep in mind where you are coming from in relation to feminism and to be a positive ally to women.
For example, perhaps you are in a conversation with a woman who identifies as a feminist. She may make a comment about the need for safe spaces for women to meet, talk, and hang out without heterosexual men around. You may feel that segregated spaces for women will feel exclusive to others. Rather than attack her point of view, ask her thoughtful questions about her comment and demonstrate you are actively listening to her. This means making eye contact with her, nodding your head as she speaks, and responding in an active way. For example, you may say, “What I am hearing you say is that safe spaces for women are important in our patriarchal society. ” If she responds yes to your response, you can then present your argument. However, always check your privilege and acknowledge that you are viewing the situation from a male perspective. This will keep the discussion proactive and honest. It is also important in these discussions to recognize that you do not need to be right or win the argument against a female feminist. Instead, the idea is to foster discussion and communication between men and women in a safe, open way. Your male privilege does not mean you are automatically correct or have the right idea, and it is important that you recognize this during your discussions with women.
You can avoid “mansplaining” by focusing on active listening to other women. Ask, “What do you think of this topic?” or state, “As a man, I am not qualified to talk about this but I look forward to hearing what you have to say. ”
Avoid making sexist jokes around your other guy friends, as this also indicates that it is okay to sexualize women and see them as sexual objects. Doing this works against feminism and the equality of the sexes.
This also extends to abortions and terminating a pregnancy. If you and your partner have an unplanned pregnancy, you can have a discussion with her about the options. But if she decides to have an abortion, as a feminist, it is important that you support her decision. Likewise, if she decides that she wants to have the child, that is her decision and you cannot tell her otherwise. Ultimately, it is her body and she has the right to decide how her body is used.
If you and your partner both work, support your partner when she pursues a big account or client at work. Encourage her to take on a leadership role in her job and in other areas of her life. This shows that you are not threatened by her ambition and determination, and that you do not buy into the stereotypical notion that only men can be leaders and achieve professional success. You should also take responsibility for roles in your relationship that may not be typically perceived as “male”. This could be doing 50% of the emotional work in the relationship, such as talking about your feelings, your thoughts, and your needs. This could also be actively listening to your partner and responding to her needs.
Once you join women’s rights groups, it is important that you participate in the conversation using active listening and take a supporting role. Check your privilege and get involved in an open and engaged way.
