Consider asking things like, “What’s it like being on the soccer team? I used to play soccer” or, “I noticed that you like to draw. What kind of things do you sketch? I like to sketch in a journal sometimes. " Do more of the activities that you both enjoy. Just make sure that not all your time is spent on this. Look at the ways that you and your crush are different. Sometimes getting to know someone involves seeing how common interests may be different in approach.
If you don’t feel like your crush would be a good friend, or that your interests are too different, think about what that may mean. Would you want to be close to someone who you don’t think would be a good friend? Allow your friendship to lead into romance, rather than the other way around. Don’t rush into something. Try to find ways to keep your mind off your crush, and focus on how to be their friend first. Consider asking your crush and his or her friends to hang out with you and your friends for a weekend event. Keep the interactions casual at first, rather than trying to find out if he or she likes you.
When you actually listen to what your crush is saying, and not just think about the way he or she looks, you’ll be able to really know what the person is like. After listening, consider responding with, “That’s really interesting” or “Wow, that’s cool. " Ask follow-up questions. When you are actively listening to your crush, you’re paying attention to what he or she is saying. Ask for details about what they are talking about, or clarification if something sounds confusing.
Act and dress in a way that feels comfortable and natural to you.
Be positive and surround yourself with other people who are positive.
Try to overcome your shyness by at least having a short conversation. Consider compliment your crush. Or talk about something that you both are doing. Consider saying things like, “I like your shirt,” or “You play the guitar well. "
Avoid wearing provocative clothes. You may be sending the wrong message to more than just your crush. For girls, you don’t need a ton of makeup or high fashion clothes. But having a presentable and healthy appearance is good. Consider wearing a mild perfume. For guys, avoid looking like you just rolled out of bed. Make sure to have clean outfits. Consider wearing cologne.
It takes time to develop a new friendship or relationship. Your crush will not notice your overnight. Realize that your crush may not intentionally be ignoring you. If it’s a large class, school, or workplace, oftentimes you may not notice someone until you interact with them a few times one-on-one.
Walk home with him or her after class. Hang out in an area of the school, or after school where it’s just you two for a little while. Work on school work together. Make yourself available to help him or her out with something.
If you are sitting next to your crush on a long car ride, you can put your head on his or her shoulder. See how your crush respond to your body language. Do they act the same way? Or do they pull back? Non-verbal cues are a good way to understand what someone is thinking but not saying.
Consider saying, “I really like talking to you” rather than just blurting out, “I like you. " Or consider saying things like, “I like your hair” or “I like hanging out with you” or “You’re really cool. "
Don’t center all your time around your crush. Remember that there are lots of cool people and fun things to do out there. And your crush shouldn’t be only thing that matters. Your crush may notice you more after you’ve had some time apart. Let them miss you a little. Hopefully, they notice when you’re not around.
